The most important thing about turning 21, of course, is that you now have the right to drink legally anywhere in the United States. You no longer have to sneak into bars or brandish a fake ID. So, if you do nothing else on this day of days, walk proudly into the bar of you’re your choice, look the bouncer boldly and proudly in the eye, and present your driver’s license to him, and proudly proclaim “I’m Legal!”
Using a 21st Birthday Party Checklist
Don’t forget to get a picture of the momentous occasion described above. And, buy that bouncer a drink! But, don’t stop at one bar. You, along with at least 21 of your friends, must visit, and drink at, 21 different drinking establishments at an absolute minimum. If all goes according to plan, this will definitely not be a day for you or any of your friends to be behind the wheel. Hire a limousine and driver for the day.
Send texts to everyone you know and plaster your birthday announcement all over facebook and every other social media site you frequent. You’re going to want A LOT of company on this day of days.
Plant a tree. It will always be as old as your majority.
Before you get too drunk, do something exciting and physically dangerous. Suggestions include skydiving or a helicopter ride.
Drink plenty of water. The more water you drink, the more alcohol you can consume! Stay close to home. It will make it that much easier to arrange the bail bond and to attend the court hearings.
If you’re female, have your sorority sisters treat you to a complete makeover. If you’re male, have your fraternity brothers take you to a strip club for a lap dance. Go to a karaoke bar and shamelessly hog the microphone. Hey – you only turn 21 once!
Have the whole bar sing the “Happy Birthday” song. You can also get a tattoo or kiss 21 strangers.
Keep a red magic marker on hand, and put a big, red “X” on your arm for every drink you take, whether or not you ultimately are able to keep it down. This is an important number, and you will want to record it for posterity. Don’t forget that people have navels for a reason. Don’t forget about belly button shots.
Rent a large hotel suit for yourself and your friends. The results of your drinking won’t be pretty, and wouldn’t you rather have someone else clean it up for you? Forget the meaning of the word “shame.” You’re going to be miserable enough with you massive post-birthday hangover to be bothered with unimportant details.